ceryt56 Beginner
Number of posts : 35 Warnings : 0/5 Registration date : 2008-07-02
| Subject: The pengy life (BOOK 1 CHAP 3) Fri Sep 19, 2008 6:25 pm | |
| Chap. 1
One morning, A penguin see a shine sun and say "ahhh A good morning" Then he took his puffle for a walk. Later, He danced at the Night club and found a DJ guy being alone playing. He said "Welcome to the night club!" Penguin say "Thanks for the warm welcome." DJ say "Your welcome." Then 2 hour laters... He was so tired,Hungry and drinky. He went over a coffee shop and order a hot chocolate coffee but a waiter said "We are out of coffee. Please come again soon." Then the penguin say "Uggh i am do drinky and want coffee!" Chap. 2
[justify] For 6 min, A coffee truck arrived and The penguin yelled "HOURRY!!" then he got coffee. Then he went to get pizza and the cheif are saying that the penguin order a chicken and the waiter said "sorry but penguin don't eat chicken. This is a pizza shop!" Then the penguin said "OH! Can i have a warm pizza?" Then the waiter said "Ok" then after 2 minutes, The pizza was ready and the penguin eat so fast like 10 sec! :O Then the penguin got to full and he always fell so he need to go to the gym to lose weight..
Chap. 3
[justify] He went to a penguin igloo which is a gym and like 10 penguin doing the push-up so the coach said "looks like you need to get so loose weight so" the penguin said "sign me up!" Then the coach said "Ok.*signs person up* Now go do push-ups" then he did like 100,000. He loosed all of his weight in 8 hours! :O. Then he like feeding his puffle but when he went to his igloo, His puffle wasn't there so he cryed. MORE COMING SOON | |
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Matty Matt Newbie
Number of posts : 6 Warnings : 0/5 Registration date : 2008-09-14
| Subject: Re: The pengy life (BOOK 1 CHAP 3) Sat Sep 27, 2008 11:51 am | |
| I do not like it that much 5/10 | |
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giatekla Admin
Number of posts : 41 Age : 25 Location : Loving Ice Island and It's 'Ventures! Warnings : 0/5 Registration date : 2008-04-20
| Subject: Re: The pengy life (BOOK 1 CHAP 3) Mon Oct 20, 2008 7:55 am | |
| Try improving your grammar and removing the tags. Also, try improving the plot and basing the story on the title.
So far, it's ok. :D
giatekla | |
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| Subject: Re: The pengy life (BOOK 1 CHAP 3) | |
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